Be afraid! Be very afraid! Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water Dearies, disgraced Toronto Mayor Rob Ford returns from 8 weeks in rehab-rehab Rob Ford-style of course.

As anyone who has ever dealt with addictions knows, either personally or through family or friends, 8 weeks is not the end of treatment…it is just the beginning of a lifelong struggle. The hubris of jumping back into the mayoral race of North America’s 4th largest city,  as if nothing has happened, is beyond gobsmacking.

For those of you who have been living under a rock, The Mayor of the beleaguered City of Toronto, who has made it the butt of many global jokes, is baaaack. Jimmy Kimmel must be doing cartwheels!

The Ford Dynasty is propelled by Brother Doug. Together, Tweedle Dumb and Tweedle Dumber are so hungry for power, that they are happily willing to sacrifice the needs of a major city and the country, for their own insatiable egos. Rob is the drug-addled doofus, manipuated by the machiavellian Doug. Even the Conservative Party of Canada, that bastion of upright behaviour and morals, is starting to distance itself from the duo.

Toronto is in full throttle election mode. Voters go to the polls on October 27. The Fords think they can win, despite: 1. Rob taking drugs throughout his term of office, finally admitting he smokes crack. Why, because a video surfaces showing him smoking crack cocaine 2. Rob’s drug/alcohol-induced crazed behaviour being filmed in Council, at civic events, in other public places, in other cities and countries, at all hours of the day and night 3. The Ford’s unabashed association with drug dealers and other disreputable types 4. Rob’s drinking and drug addiction interfering with most business being conducted throughout his term in office 5. More of the same, ad nauseum.

A group of far more able councillors are running to replace an addict with a sense of entitlement that is truly gobsmacking. ANY ONE of these candidates would do a better job than this navel-gazing, narcissistic hologram.

The Rob Ford “mea culpa” moment comes in carefully crafted and tirelessly coached performances. It is still all about Rob. It never mentions the irrepairable damage done to the City of Toronto in the past 3 years. It is still all about Rob. Mr. Ford is out amongst ‘his people’, with dozens of bodyguards of course. Should any non-well-wishers vocalize their disapproval, these same bodyguards suggest the deviant ‘go to anger management classes’. Hypocracy is the Ford credo.

Please don’t get me wrong Dearies. While I grew up in Toronto, it has always seemed to be a legend in its own mind, to me.  You could not pay me to move back there, with the never-ending winters that zoom straight into the most humid of summers. However, I would not wish the Ford brothers on my worst enemies, ranking them No. 1 on the Top Ten list of biblical plagues.

Dearies, all of this would be absolutely, hysterically funny, if it werent so depressingly pathetic. That great wit, philosopher and raconteur, Bugs Bunny pretty much described Rob Ford best, when he stated : “What a Maroon! What an ignoranomous!”  http://youtu.be/C_Kh7nLplWo

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